Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
