You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She told me I should be a condom model.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
