Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
