haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I faked an abortion last night.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize