i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
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