It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Randomize
