Screwed.edu
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize