farters have to be the big spoon...
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize