It's like a parade of train wrecks.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize