i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
