Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
