he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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