So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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