If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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