you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
