Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize