Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
