I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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