I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize