I never want to see another naked old woman again.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
It's official drugs can't kill me
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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