Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'm getting married
To pizza
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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