If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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