I could have mohawked her pubes.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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