We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize