My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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