..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize