White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
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