My brain says no but my pants say off.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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