apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
