everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
