Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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