dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize