Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
