I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
