She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
