My girlfriend figured out who you are.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
