lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
