TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
