Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I just pynch a tree in the face
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
