I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
