***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
