dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
