I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
