Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Randomize
