"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
