we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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