Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize