He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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