You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
