this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
