You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
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